Hard week - prayers needed

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Shannon Daves

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I've posted this on two other boards that I visit often. Your prayers would be greatly appreciated.



Well, I've been off the internet for about a week. I post this because I remember reading another somewhat similar story a few weeks ago.



Last Saturday evening, our lives changed forever. I was at the fire station and we had just finished supper. The phone rang and the guy that answered it motioned for me and asked if "she was alright?" (referring to my wife). When I got on the phone my wife was histerical. All she could say was "come home, mom's been shot". Her ex-husband had shot her and she was still conscious and able to tell them. I left immediately to go home. I arranged someone to come to my house to watch our 2 yo daughter, and we left for Grady hospital in Atlanta. It is about a 45 minute ride from the station to home, then about an hour and a half to the hospital. It was the longest ride of my life. While enroute, the investigator called and asked if he (ex-husband) knew where we lived. He did, and they asked if anyone was at my house. I knew where this was going and told him I would handle it. I called some friends in the SO and had 3 officers at my house within 5 minutes and they escorted my family and daughter to my father-in-laws house who is a state police officer.



I called the helicopter crew and they put me in touch with the ER doctor. He said she was shot in the left eye, but it appears to be facial injuries only. For the entire ride, I assured my wife that it was not as bad as we thought. My wife was still understandably very upset the entire way. We got to the hospital, and had to wait over 4 hours until I finally physically stopped a Dr. I was still in uniform, and I think that helped them to talk to me. Without any warning, the doctor told us that she had suffered a catastrophic brain injury, and would not survive. After being told that it wasn't that severe earlier, made this extra shocking. My wife was to the point of being unable to stand.



My mother in law was admitted to the ICU on life support. After 5 days and numerous consultations, we were told that without a doubt it was futile. She would at best be ventilator dependent and in a vegetative state for the rest of her life. Thursday we made the decision to remove her from life support. She lived for 39 hours and passed Saturday morning around 0645. She did not have a living will, but had told us in the past she did not want to live that way. She was a nurse, so we knew she understood what it meant.



My wife is devastated. She is on medication for her to just manage to function right now. She was her mom's only constant family, due to family problems with her brother, sister and son. My wife and her were also best friends. They would talk 2-3 times a day and would do things together several times a week. My daughter and her were extremely close, and she wants to know where "grammy" is. On top of all this, the murderer was my wife's step-dad. They had recently divorced after 15 years of marriage. He is currently in jail, and along with the funeral, we face in the future a murder trial. My mother in law's body is currently at the state crime lab for an autopsy. The funeral should be this Wednesday.



I type this for two reasons.



1) Is to to get it out. I've had to step up as the family spokesperson and representative and be strong for everyone. I also had to go to her house today to try to find some papers and get some clothes for her burial. I was very close to her, and this is harder than I could have imagined, but pales in comparison to the pain my wife is experiencing.



2) AND MOST IMPORTANT. Live every day to it's fullest. Sounds sappy, but it takes something like this to make you realize. We were supposed to be at her house last Sunday for lunch, but instead we were in an ICU room with her. Nothing is gauranteed. It's made me realize not to take anything, or anyone for granted. It'
 
Prayers are sent for the comfort of you and your family during this time of great need.
 
Scooby, sorry to hear all your family is enduring. Prayers on the way for all of you. Hutch
 
Prayers incoming from Ky. Let me tell you, these folks know how to pray! Man, I do not know what to say in this situation, keep you faith in God and he will deliver you and your family from this.



Jeff
 
Scooby, I wrote Scooby five minutes ago because it's hard to write anything else. Certainly I'll say a prayer for Crystal and Emily and her Grammy.. I will also say a prayer for you and anyone else grieving over Grammy. Scooby, Grammy is in Emily's heart. That won't go away.

I'm so sorry.



Uncle Billy
 
My condolences and prayers for you and your family Firescoby....
 
Jeez Scoob...sorry to hear that dude...Prayers will be sent for all.

It seems NTOWS has been reelin' with problems lately...hope it goes away soon.
 
Man,..that's horrible!! I can't imagine your wife's feelings right now....prayers are on the way!!



Keep the faith Scooby....you're the pillar they're leaning on now!! :(

Mac
 
Scooby, prayers going out for all of ya'll. So sorry to hear this.



BruceM
 
Man, this is terrible. Prayers are coming up your way. Keep the faith Firescooby! We are all with you at this time of grief and shock.

Barry:(
 
Thoughts and prayers from here too.....be strong and endure.
 
Scooby - I am soo sorry for your loss and the horror your family has and will go through, as you heal and move forward.



Anything we can do, please let us know!



Trep
 
A little late, but here's another prayer. Just remember Romans 8:28.
 
That is a very tragic story. My heart goes out to you and your family. I can only imagine the pain that your wife feels not being able to say goodbye and have some kind of closure to this. My entire family will pray for your wife's comfort and peace.
 
Absolutely tragic. I can't imagine the emotions that you and your family must be feeling. Be strong and let us know if we can help in any way above and beyond prayers.



TOXIC
 
Thanks everyone for the thoughts and prayers.



The funeral is Wednesday, with visitation tomorrow evening. The next two days will be hard, but I am afraid some of the hardest times are yet to come. I've been to her house twice so far to get clothes for the burial. She told my daughter and her friends that she had a will, but I wasn't able to find it in the obvious places. The upcoming murder trial will also be very difficult. I really don't think for me that the reality has set in. It still seems like it's been a constant blur since last Saturday evening. I think having to do most of the decisions, calling, errands, etc have helped me cope with it. I'm just afraid what's gonna happen when all that stuff is done and I actually have time to think about it.



Again though, y'all are great. Thanks for everything.
 
Very sorry to hear about your tragic loss. Be strong for those who need you but make sure you take your own time to grieve. Don't let it all build up. Prayers are with you.
 
There are no words. So sorry for your loss. Your wife is lucky to have you there to take on so much burden. As Teri stated, take some time for your self. This may not be appropriate at this time, but may the murderer rot in jail, or better yet, in hell.
 
Firescobby, Our internet has been down and I am just now reading this. I promise you that my family and I will remember you and yours in our prayers.



God be with you,

Steve
 

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