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Ken Neeley

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Post a funny story line or stay outta my thread....no offensive crap, innuendo's of offensive crap, no bickering, fighting etc....



Now............



"Once upon a freakin' time, a group of NICE, FRIENDLY Michigan fisherman were stranded in their boxers in the middle of the lake, when they spotted a bright yellow Banana Boat off in the distance........
 
....the driver of the boat was the hot babe who the Michigan Mafia dreamed of meeting.....
 
...as it pulled closer, we spotted the tell-tale skid mark off the port side gunwale, and knew our dream had come true...
 
Then the hottie in the banana boat saw what appeared to be a beached whale on the rear deck. As she got closer, she realized it wasn't Orca but rather Snowman, and then she....



 
Then one of the Michigan Mafia members whipped out a Shakespeare, er All-Star rod and started duelling for the incredibly-effiminate, princess of a non-cigar smoking lady. One quick jab to the inch worm and the ugly man holding the ugly stick was out to a fast lead.



 
Well since one of the original board memebers (and now UNEMPLOYED FORMER All Star Employee) was standing by with a NEW rod company.....he was ready to divulge the secrets of the pond they were fishing....

 
and then Mini screamed "Stay out of my ****!"
 
...as he left his own skid mark on the starboard side...
 
...and then Princess Banana began to sing..."Mini crapped corn and I don't care, Mini crapped corn, and I don't care".....
 
Then Snowman asked... I thought you were still All-Star pro-staff. Forget the hottie, let's hear about fishing stuff.
 
everyone gasped at Snow and thought to themselves...."the truth comes out...he'd rather get bass than a**...."
 
Snowman reminded the masses that he's married and is allowed to get bass from any lake, but not the other :).
 
"Bwaaahaaahaaaaa"....they all said..."that Snow is funnier than a Polish dude at a terd shining contest!!!"
 
and while Snow and Neeley debated, Princess Banana was swept away by Rich D and his big cigar...
 
and then Snow sat on his new Kwikdrop seat pedestal and it proceeded to kollapse and drop him kwickly on his arse, at which point he drop-kicked it overboard and broke a toe in the process.



"I WILL SCREAM TO THE WORLD....DO NOT BUY A KWIKDROP...THEY ARE FROM THE DEVIL HIMSELF!!!!!!!!!"...he exclaimed
 
Meanwhile back on the lake....



The Bananna Queen has piloted her craft to be just out of castnig distance from Mac's Scales and Tales boat. She is spying on Mac trying to get to Mini's ****.....
 
And the Devil said, "Snowman is a GIRLIEMAN, he can't even drop kick a little seat pedestal. He broke his little baby girl toe. BBBRRRHAHAHHAHA!!!!!"
 
but they had money..HEE HEEE HHE#HEHEHEHEHH HEHEHH Or no sense..HEEE
 
All of a sudden someone noticed off in the distance, about a mile away, a four foot inflatable (boat that is) being paddled by a girl (I think) dressed in chartruesse nightie paddleing her way toward the group. Paddle in one hand and holding up a sign in the other hand that read "Call the Moores Today or Else"



 
"It's LAVENDER, dammit, LAVENDER"....she screamed....
 
"LAVENDER! Loch Ness' cousin! Everyone get off the water!" she screamed as she paddled furiously accross Champlain's seas blue waters.
 
A calm silence descended as Champy reared her ugly head..."where is Rob, the Famed Champy Hunter when we need him...???"
 
Somehere in the Plattburgh region, a Ranger bass boat was spotted with two swirling bodies aboard.....was it the famed dynamic duo? Could it be that they have commandeered a bass boat to search the lake?



Upon closer inspection it was believed to be Mike Iaconelli and Ron LaMoy having a break dancing contest on an R83.....or was it the much needed suppport of the Legion of Super Heros to help quell Champy once and for all?!?!?
 
As they drew nearer, the sheen from their pink naugethongs glistened as they spun and whirled on the front deck of the Ranger....
 
and the obvious snickers from people staning by was heard...."And they call themselves BASSFISHERMAN!"
 
...while Greg Meyer piloted the boat wearing nothing more than a holster, sidearm, and a big ol' GRIN.
 
As Champy watched all the whirling and twirling, he began to get dizzy and disoriented...
 
Confused by the seemingly odd tactics of the dynamic duo, Champy reared its head above water just in time for Super Rob to cast his favorite chartruese double willow spinnerbait in its direction.....disorientated Champy saw 4 baits and tought it was a swarm of cormorants....and a reaction strike occured....
 
As he turned his head to strike at Rob's secret weapon, Rob performed a double-bogey-triple-twisty-head-spinning-hookset that drove the lure through his scaly lips....
 
Ike jumped in the air, landed on his head and did a curly-flopping-toe-spinny-butt-rolling-back-spin and yelled to Super Rob..."I think we need a bigger net...let me call the TD and see if bigger nets are legal..."
 
Rob shouts: "You silly Jersey boy, those tatoo's have gone to your head! We arent in a tourney! Get the friggin BATNET!" Drag is screaming, water is exploding aside the R83, a crowd begins to gather.....



 
"Oh yeah," Ike screamed..."let me go to the back of the RANGER, in the compartment by the YAMAHA, I think the BATNET is down by this box of MANN'S baits near the UNCLE JOSH trailers....OH NO...it's tangled in the STREN LINE spooled up on my DAIWA....if I could only find my FITOVER glasses to see this mess better...when this is all over, I'll have to go to DICK'S to get another pair..."
 
At that point Rob ran to the back of the boat and proceeded to put a wooopin on mike's Yamaha sponsored @$$. All the while mike screemin at the top of his lungs...."Never give up....Never give uuuuppp!"



 
Until the final blow from lamoy send him swimming into the deep dark waters of Champy's home.......heck in retrospect, Rob is feeding Champy!
 
And in TRUE B-Movie fashion...



Our hero(?), kneeling on the back deck of the R83, catching his breath from the terrible battle with MikeIke, was suddenly startled by a loud splash from behind. OH NO!!! The beast (Champy) breaks the surface like a gut-hooked smallie on steroids, with a mouth full of MikeIke!!!
 
It has been rumored that on a clear still night on the lake you can STILL here Ike yelling "Never give up!".



I wonder if the flame shirt gave Champy heartburn?



Mini
 
Ike is sure to make a long skinny and very smelly mud shark when champy is finished digesting him.
 
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