Stupid ramp tricls

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Rich Stern

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We've talked about dumb things we've done while trailering, boating or fishing. Let me share with you the moronic behavior I witnessed at the ramp today.



Double ramp with no divider in between the lanes, requires just a bit of extra care when backing down to stay on your side because it's just wide enough for two trailers.



I'm next in line waiting for a lane to clear. A 21' Wellcraft center console is backing down on one side. A Chevy S-10 is trying to pull an older 18 or 19' bowrider out. He's spinning his wheels. The teenagers with him jump up on the sides of the pickup truck to give him some extra traction. But they don't climb in the bed. They just lay their bodies over the side of the bed, right over the wheel wells, legs sticking out the side, torsos sorta leaned over into the bed. The S-10 really lays on the gas, the wheels are spinning like mad and starting burn rubber. The boat is starting to come out of the water. He's gaining speed, the boat comes out of the water, the kids are still precariously balanced on the sides. The boat comes all the way out, but the S-10 guy never lays off the gas. If anything, he's gunning it like he's drag racing. The wheels are now throwing up a plume of smoke and he's starting to accelerate up the ramp past the Wellcraft, with the kids legs dangling right near the wheel wells. I expect to see legs get sucked in and mangled any moment. Keep waiting and waiting for him to get off the accelerator, but it never happens. He's probably doing 25 miles an hour when he gets to top of the ramp, wheels spinning and smoking all the way. The wheels don't stop spinning until he hits the gravel at the end of the ramp. The kids somehow escaped injury.



The people witnessing this all look dumbstruck. I get my boat down the ramp. I'm standing there next to the Wellcraft guy. I say, "You seen anything dumber than that this season?" He said, "If you can believe it, I actually saw one dumber than that yesterday."

 
Not as dumb as yours, but today we watched a guy in the middle of the ramp spend about 30 min.putting together his fold - a - boat. When we came back in from fishing he was in the middle of the ramp again , folding up his boat.Hate people who don't have anything ready and spend too much time at the ramp.
 
Well, I added one to my list this weekend. I was at a launch that I had used just last weekend uneventfully. I was pulling by boat out and had the engine trimmed up, (not enough I later discovered as the water had dropped another foot). Well, my engine kept stalling, and jumping a little. I couldn't figure out why and kept crankin it and trying to get it into gear, when my 13 year old fishing partner for the day, observed the obvious, "I think you're hitting the rocks". Sure enough, the water was now low enough that I chewed up the outside of my SS prop. Didn't lose any pieces, but it will need to be re-cupped. I felt like an idiot. We did catch fish though. And Zeb, my 13 year old cousin caught his 1st largemouth that day, and a 2lber at that. It made it worth it. What's a $100 repair bill to hook a kid on fishing. But just the same, I would have had a good time had that NOT happened. Chock one up for the Robster!
 
One time Mac and I were out fun-fishing and he was loading up the boat...just as he began to pull it on the trailer, he squirted lime juice in his eye and spilled an entire bottle of icy cold Corona right down the front of his shirt and in his lap....talk about alcohol abuse!!!!!
 
I seen one that was alot dumber too. A week ago when we came back to the ramp to take out there was this 20 to 25 foot cruiser putting in, no big deal right. Well this guy with his family floats this rig off the trailer and proceeds to man handle this rig to where this stern is next to the ramp and the dock. His wife pulls the trailer out and go up and make a uturn and come down the ramp with the truck. You all guessed it that batteries are dead in this rig and he knew it before he even unloaded it because all the time he never got in the boat to try. This guy is standing in about 2ft. of water and handling jumper cables and blocking the entire 3rig ramp for almost a hour boy were people uptight for awhile.
 
Took my uncle out yesterday in 30mph winds. Did not want to go, but he had been looking forward to it for weeks, so we braved it. There were 6' swells, boat did well, but I broke all my battery mounts. Coast Guard had 17 rescues by noon, NONE were bass boats, and there were a few out there believe it or not. We all new our craft, water, and machine. Got back safe and sound...WET but safe. On the way back to the launch, I almost ran over 2 idiots on sailboards that had decided to just lay on their boards in the way to the launch in the sloughs where we couldn't see them. JUST barely squeaked by them at the last second. They yelled at me like it was MY fault THEY were in the way of the launch in water that you couldn't see a small boat let alone a nimrod on just bobbing around in a life jacket next to board. Some people are just without a clue. On a side note, I hit my 1st seagull on Sat. NOT ON PURPOSE, just was looking the other way and he bounced off the hull. Didn't kill him, just dazed him real good and scared Zeb, (my passenger) real bad as it was on his side. Good thing that bird didn't make it up a little farther, Zeb might have had a seagull lunch on the run!
 
My favorite thing at the ramp (and I see it all the time) are the people who don't back down far enough to float the boat off the trailer. They only back down a little and almost kill themselves trying to push the boat off. They look like those guys on the "Worlds Strongest Man" competions. Turning purple with veins popping out of their heads and then they start grunting...LOL Then when I offer some assistance they all say the same thing "No, I can get it. I do this all the time".....LMAO



I admit it takes a long time, but boy is it entertaining.



Marke
 
See, Marke..........



Just a few months ago you were asking for "Stupid Ramp Stories" so you'd know what NOT to do once you got your first boat! Guess you kids can learn a lesson from us old folk - at least when it comes to not making complete fools of yourselves!



Now, you're an "Old Salt", too!



me!
 

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